It will limit your happiness, wealth, and success, if you let it.

It holds most people back from living the life of their dreams.

You are not most people.

It forces people to fit into boxes not made for them. It forces people to play it safe and settle for a life they never wanted.

But that’s not going to happen to you in 2019.

If you want to become the beast destiny intended, in any area of your life.

You can’t be afraid to fail. As Will Smith explains failure is integral to success.

You have to understand that failure doesn’t mean you should quit something. It’s simply showing you one way that didn’t work.

Here’s how you can overcome failure and come back stronger than ever.

Your Comeback Story Starts Now

1. Take 100% Responsibility   | Bounce Back From Failure

The first step to dealing with failure is to take 100% responsibility. As Jack Canfield said in the Success Principles, “To achieve major success in life, to achieve those things that are most important to you, you must assume 100% responsibility for your life. Nothing less will do.”

Don’t blame anyone else but yourself.

Pushing failure to someone else or something else externally takes away your power.

Instead, think of what it taught you, what you did wrong and what kind of person do you need to become to make it happen.

2. Understand That You’re Not a Failure | Bounce Back From Failure

You are not your failures nor are you your successes. You are you. If you fail, especially if you fail big, you are not a failure. You are a warrior.

“I tried and failed” has 10x the heart of “I never tried.” & only a warrior picks themselves up and goes again & again.

Dwelling on it, especially if it’s emotional to you, will only make the failure gain more power in your life. Instead, acknowledge what happened, learn from it, make a new gameplan and move forward.

Don’t look back, you’re not going that way.

3. Reframe Failures | Bounce Back From Failure

As I said, failures are just showing you a way that didn’t work. It’s not to say you’re supposed to quit something entirely. It’s simply saying, this route doesn’t work, find another way.

Failure is all about what you learn and the experience you gain. Zig Ziglar said, “If you learn from defeat, you haven’t really lost.”

The more you can analyze and learn from your past missteps, the more you can take those lessons into future endeavors.

Remember, just because something didn’t work the first time doesn’t mean you are a failure or your idea didn’t work. It just means you need to get resourceful, find new solutions, and try again.

Always ask for advice, learn from defeat, and keep at it until you reach your goal. Find a way. If you keep knocking on that door for success, eventually it’ll crumble and you’ll find a way in. Stay relentless in your pursuit of greatness.

Remember, your failures are preparing you for massive success.

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You might not have the same inspiration you had at the beginning of pursuing your big dream.

I know because I fought this and had to overcome this struggle a couple of months ago. Entrepreneurship kept feeling like it was kicking me when I was down.

But I kept reminding myself that success isn’t supposed to be easy or everyone would have million dollar homes and supercars.

Instead, I flipped the way I looked at everything.

I quit thinking of my “failures” and started focusing on how it was helping me become the person, who could be successful.

I started embracing the situation and appreciating the benefits.

You can do the same by learning these three crucial lessons of success:

Fail Your Way to Success

1. You Develop Grit and Perseverance  

One of the best parts about “failing” is that you get tough. You learn how much you really want the goal. And if you’re like me, you really want it.

But tough times are also an opportunity to reflect on what you’ve already accomplished.  You didn’t make it to where you are now by accident; you’ve worked hard, gained wisdom, and have probably helped people along the way.  Now is the time to reflect on those accomplishments and congratulate yourself for how far you’ve come.

In that reflection time, it’s inevitable that you’ll begin to realize how resilient you’ve become. And that’s a trait that will make you successful you in any endeavor the rest of your life. It can’t be taught, it’s something you have to go through on your own.

Quit beating yourself up for not finding the goal line yet and focus on how much stronger and smarter you are.  Remember, as Samuel Johnson said, “Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance.”

2. You Learn To Find New Solutions

If you’re working hard and long, sometimes it’s the Universe trying to tell you something.  It might be trying to help you find a new solution to the problem you’re trying to solve. In my case, I found that I wasn’t finding success in certain entrepreneurial activities because I kept trying the same methods over and over again.

You may need to learn how to better balance your energy, learn new skills, and find people that can help you get to the goal. And you might learn new skills or attract new people that you probably wouldn’t have if you already found success.

3. You Find Hidden Life Lessons

The last part of “failing your way to success” is that you learn some hidden lessons that you can’t read in any book or listen to in any podcast. Some things you just have to go through on your own to really feel them.

You’re going to learn so much more about yourself in tough time or when things are failing than you’ll ever learn when you’re coasting to success.

As Fred Brooks said,

“You can learn more from failure than success. In failure, you’re forced to find out what part did not work. But in success, you can believe everything you did was great when in fact some parts may not have worked at all. Failure forces you face reality.”

Instead of focusing on the frustration and discouragement of the short term, shift your focus instead on how this time can help you in the long term. The only thing you can do is adapt, learn, and keep moving forward. If you quit, you’ll never know if the day after that would’ve been the day you found massive success.

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Denzel Washington was flunking out of college, with no idea what he was going to do with his life. When one day while sitting in his mother’s beauty parlor, a random lady in the salon sitting under a hair dryer cried out for a pen, because a prophecy, a vision for the future had overcome her.

She told Denzel, “Boy, you are going to travel the world and speak to millions of people.” Denzel was perplexed, he was flunking out of college and his life was directionless.

No one in the salon that day believed that Denzel would go on to become one of the most recognisable faces in the world.

It wasn’t all plain sailing for Denzel Washington, along the way he learned that if you aren’t prepared to dream big and fail big you will never achieve your version of success.

Don’t Be Afraid to Fail Big, To Dream Big – Denzel Washington

Full Transcript | Speaker: Denzel Washington

I was flunking out of college, I had a 1.7 grade point average, I hope non of you can relate.

I had a 1.7 grade point average, I was sitting in my mother’s beauty shop, they still call it beauty shop now?

What they call it now? Yeah, I was sitting in the beauty parlor. I was sitting in my mother’s beauty parlor and I’m looking in the mirror, and I see behind me this woman under the dryer and every time she looked up, every time I looked up, she was looking at me, just looking me in the eye.

I didn’t know who she was, she said “Somebody get me a pen, get me a pencil, I have a prophecy.”

March 27, 1975, she said. “Boy, you are going to travel the world and speak to millions of people.” Now mind you, I was flunked out of college, I’m thinking about going the army, I didn’t know what I was going to do and she’s telling me I’m going to travel the world and speak to millions of people.

Well, I have travelled the world and I have spoke to millions of people.

That’s not the most important thing, the success that I had, the most important thing is that, what she taught me, and what she told me that day has stayed with me since.

I’ve been protected, I’ve been directed, I’ve been corrected.

Fail BIG. That’s right. Fail big.

You only live once, so do what you feel passionate about, take chances, professionally don’t be afraid to fail.

There’s an old IQ test that was nine dots and you had to draw five lines with a pencil within these nine dots without lifting the pencil. The only way to do it, was to go outside the box.

So don’t be afraid to go outside the box. Don’t be afraid to think outside the box.

Don’t be afraid to fail big, to dream big. But remember, dreams, without goals are just dreams.

They ultimately fuel disappointment. So have dreams, but have goals, life goals, yearly goals, monthly goals, daily goals.

I try to give myself a goal every day. Understand that to achieve these goals you must apply discipline and consistency. You have to work at it every day. You have to plan every day. You’ve heard the saying “We don’t plan to fail, we fail to plan.”

Hard work works. Working really hard is what successful people do. In this text, tweet, twerk world that you’ve grown up in, remember just because you’re doing a lot more doesn’t mean you’re getting a lot more done. Remember just because you’re doing a lot more doesn’t mean you’re getting a lot more done. Don’t confuse movement with progress. My mother told me, she said “Yeah because you can  run in place all the time and never get anywhere.”

Continue to strive, continue to have goals, continue to progress and anything you want good, you can have. Claim it, work hard to get it, when you get it reach back, pull someone else up. Each one teach one.

Don’t just aspire to make a living. Aspire to make a difference.

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While most people fear failure, Thomas Edison and other successful people learned to love failing. They understand that failure is part of the process to be successful at anything.

Use these Thomas Edison quotes to change your definition of failure and find success in your life.

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” — Thomas Edison

Would you have kept going at any of your goals if you “failed” 9,999 times? Most people wouldn’t. But if you want to become great at anything you have to learn to keep going.

You need to learn to frame the word “failure.” Because of school, it gets a negative connotation but in reality, failure IS the road to success. The most successful people in the world simply failed the most (and quicker) than everyone else.  Learn to make failure your best friend.

“Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” — Thomas Edison

As Les Brown said, “Most people give up on the one-yard line.” And it’s true. The last part to achieve anything great is almost always the hardest.

Just because you fail or things get hard doesn’t mean you should quit. It means you should find another way and keep your target in mind. If you have a strong WHY you won’t want to quit but instead will find a way to make it happen.

“Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time.” — Thomas Edison Quotes

Edison understood failure better than anyone. If you give up you will NEVER succeed.

The next time you feel like giving up on your business, project, or goal keep going. Would you rather end up failing and learning or stop completely? 

Learn, fail, adapt, try again. Do this formula until you make your dreams happen!

“If we did all the things we are capable of, we would literally astound ourselves.” – Thomas Edison

Human beings have the capability to do more than you could ever begin to imagine. We’ve found a way to visit the moon, launch satellites, and accomplish other amazing feats. Never forget that humans can do nearly anything.

Yes, it will be hard work at times. Yes, it will require sacrifice. And yes, it won’t be easy but it will always be worth it.

“When you have exhausted all possibilities, remember this; you haven’t.” – Thomas Edison Quotes

You can always find a new way once you learn from your failures. There is always a way, sometimes you might need a small break but don’t give up. Keep going!

Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent perspiration.” – Thomas Edison

Inspiration gets you take action but perspiration is the key to make it happen. Learn to inspire yourself daily to put in the work and make your dreams come true.

Use these Thomas Edison quotes to embrace failure and learn to fail your way to success!

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Failure is a double-edged sword. It holds people back from living their dreams and the reason people stay at jobs they hate. They are scared of failing if they leave.

The word “failure” has a such a negative connotation, probably from our education system. If you fail in school then you are a”failure.” But in reality, failure is the key to achieving massive success in any area of your life.

It’s time to understand that failure is an asset and if used correctly, can catapult you to massive success. No one knows this better than one of the most successful actors in Hollywood, Will Smith. He talks passionately about how to use failure to become successful. 

Here’s what I learned about failure from Will Smith.

Why You Should Learn to Love Failure Will Smith Explains

Successful People Fail The Most

Everyone, at some level, wants to be successful. Whether it’s financially, spiritually or in the form of happiness. People are wired to want to be successful but most people don’t take the risks needed to be successful.

Why is that?

Fear of failure.

But the world’s most successful people in the world like Tony Robbins, Oprah Winfrey, and Steve Jobs all failed. Even Michael Jordan was cut from his high school basketball team. But the difference between successful people and unsuccessful people is how they view failure.

Successful people understand that failure is the reason for their success. They didn’t think of failure as a bad thing but instead a way to learn and improve.

This Will Smith quote says it best, “You know, when you go to the gym and you work out, you’re actually seeking failure, you want to take your muscles to the point where you get to failure, because that’s where the adaptation is, that’s where growth is.”

Use this mentality and actively seek out failure in your life. Fail big and fail often but make sure you learn from every “failure.” The more you learn the more likely you will be able to carry your wisdom and lessons into the future.

Failure Is Where You Learn the Most – Learn to Love Failure Will Smith

Successful people are admired by the masses. It’s so easy to see people like Will Smith,  top athletes or millionaires and think they just became successful without failure. But that’s just not the case. If anything, successful people failed MORE than most people.

As Will Smith said, “Fail early, fail often, fail forward.”

Once you understand that successful people failed more than everyone else you need to start doing the same. Start actively seeking out opportunities for you to “fail” at.

Get out of your comfort zone as often as possible. The more comfortable you get being uncomfortable the more you fail and learn. Like Will Smith noted, “Practice is controlled failure, you’re getting to your limit (…) You can’t live that, you can’t do that, until you get to the point that all of a sudden your body makes the adjustment and then you can do it.”

Push yourself to fail as often as possible in the pursuit of your own greatness. You will learn more than you ever will from trying to play it safe. If you want to achieve greatness in any area of your life you have to be willing to take chances. Learn to bet on yourself and the Universe will greatly reward you. 

Remember, “You have to live at the edge of your capabilities. You gotta live where you’re almost certain you’re going to fail.” -Will Smith

Learn to Love Failure Will Smith

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Failure is the best thing that ever happened to you?

You failed..

I have failed too.

But what is good about failure?

Everyone single person on the planet has failed at some point.

Some have failed in their marriages, some in their academics.

Some gave up after failing the first time, and never give it a second thought.

You failed once and you’re thinking about giving up?

You’re ready to join all the others and accept your fate?

But you haven’t yet? Read on, before making your decision.

So why should you fail?

Failing can be unpleasant.

We all cope with failures everyday. I’m sure you failed the first time you tried to ride a bike, some people may have even had a bad fall. They may have become scared of the pain and embarrassment, they might never touch another bicycle again.

But then there are others who failed again and again and again. Battered and bruised they just wouldn’t stop. What is the difference between the two?

How they think.

So why is failure the best thing?

Why you should fail is simple.

Fail because it is beneficial to your future.

Why would anyone see failure as beneficial? Here are three good reasons you should embrace failure.

You have a story to tell

Who cares about your story? Tell that to the young man who started rapping in Detroit. His name was B Rabbit.

The first time that he stepped on stage, he got stage fright, began stuttering and couldn’t speak. He was mocked, jeered and booed off the stage.

Despite the fear and embarrassment. He never gave up. In one of his songs, he says “Success is my only f**king option, failure’s not.” His name is Eminem.

Who cares about his failure? His father abandoned him, he was abused by his mother and grew up in a trailer park, but his belief in himself and his passion for music was so strong that this skinny kid from St Joseph, Missouri. Became not only the highest selling rapper of all time, but also the best selling musician of this century!

Now there are millions of people that could recite that story in much greater detail without thinking twice.

Failure is the best thing that every happened to you. It gives you a great comeback story.

You learn

We often forget other people’s past failures, someone as successful as Oprah Winfrey must of just got lucky right? Well, Oprah was born to a teenage mother without a dollar to her name, not only did she have to endure tough living conditions but she was sexually abused when she was just nine years old. By 14 she fell pregnant, but being so young her son died shortly after birth.

After this experience Oprah went to live with her father Vernon, who encouraged her to focus on her schooling as a was to get her life back on track. Oprah put everything into her school work eventually earning a full scholarship at Tennessee State University where she majored in communications.

Her first job was helping out at a small radio station, where she observed how the industry worked. Oprah thought she had finally had her big break when she was hired by a local television station to read the news, but things didn’t go as planned. Oprah was fired for being “unfit for television.” Oprah found work at another tv station. She worked many low paying jobs until she decided to re-locate to Chicago, to host a station’s low-rated talk show called AM Chicago. Within a few months, the show went from last in the ratings, to higher than Donahue, which was the number one show at the time. This led to the show being renamed The Oprah Winfrey Show! Despite the setbacks Oprah never gave up and went on to become a household name. She is now valued at $2.7 Billion.

Failure is the best thing that ever happened to you. It helps you grow, learn, develop.

You develop mental strength

I am sure developing mental strength might seem like a raw deal, I mean you have to fail to get it. But it is relatively simple. You LEARN from your failures, every single successful person says their failures are what drove them to become successful. What happens when you make an embarrassing mistake? Do you every make that mistake again? Well you’ll do everything in your power not to. You have two options: 1. Fail, give up and never try again, or: 2. Fail, and become so possessed with not failing again that you use it as fuel to drive you forward every single day. Take yourself to a another level of determination. What would happen if you really gave 100%? not 99%, not 8 hours a day and give up, not weekends off, not stick your toe in the water… But dive in head first 100% effort.

Failure is the best thing that ever happened to you. It grows your character like nothing else.

I dare you to try it.

Who is Thomas Edison to you? He is the guy who kept on working even after the 100th failure. I’m sure, like me you’ve heard that story many times. But what did you take from it?

The invention of the light bulb was a historical landmark. Afterwards he was interviewed. A reporter asked him after failing more than 100 times what led to your success?

His reply was incredible. He Said:

Who told you I failed in those 100 attempts? In fact I learned over 100 ways of not making a light bulb.

Failure is the best thing that ever happened to you.

That’s the positive mindset you can derive when you fail. Failure can make you stronger, it just depends on your mindset. You see every mountain as conquerable. Every challenge as possible. You see yourself as an expert now matter how many times you’ve failed, because you have an unshakeable belief that you will succeed.

Who cares about your failures when you succeed? No one. Your failures are forgotten. I’m sure you’ve heard of the Wright brothers who are credited with inventing the aeroplane.

But have you heard of Samuel Pierpont Langley? Heard of that name before? I doubt if anyone has. He was the other person also attempting to build the airplane at the same time the Wright brothers were.

In fact he had a whole lot of support. Langley had achieved some renown within the academic community as an astronomer, which earned him many high-ranking and prestigious positions.

He was the secretary of the Smithsonian Institution. He had been an assistant in the Harvard College Observatory and professor of mathematics at the United States Naval Academy.

Langley was very well connected. His friends included some of the most powerful men in government and business, including Andrew Carnegie and Alexander Graham Bell.

He was also extremely well funded. The War Department, the precursor the Department of Defence, had given him $50,000 in 1901 for the project (around $2,000,000 today).

The New York Times followed him everywhere. He gathered some of the most brilliant minds of the time to work on the project.

Langley wanted to be the first to invent the flying machine. He wanted the kind of fame men like Thomas Edison had achieved after his invention.

With all the support & resources he had how did he not complete his objective first?

Well he was completely OUTWORKED, out thought, and out manoeuvred by two brothers who despite their modest resources, were rich in the most important attribute of all.

MENTAL STRENGTH.

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One the most challenging aspects of avoiding failure, pain and regret is that it’s not until we experience them that we actually learn how to avoid them.

We don’t know the stove is hot until we touch it, and we don’t know what losing a championship feels like until the final point is scored. The actions that led to these results are ultimately where we went wrong, but in the moments beforehand we have trouble recognizing the signs.

Sure, we can listen to a nagging parent who tells us to keep our hands away from hot things and we can hear the words of other people who have experienced similar events. But to truly understand something we need to actually experience it ourselves.

Prepare For Pain And Act Accordingly.

Pain can come in a number of varying forms. It can be the physical pain of an injury or it can be the emotional pain of loss. In both instances, we are often left with one common emotion.

Regret.

We can’t help but think “what if I just…” or “If only I had done…”

Deep down we know these statements can’t do anything to fix the situation, but I believe they serve a greater purpose.

The common problem for many people is that in these moments of pain and regret, they tell themselves all the things they wish they would have done differently and they toil over all the ways they will never let this happen again. It’s an extremely tense moment, but often we have our greatest revelations in these trying times.

Unfortunately, a month or two later, a lot of these ideas and plans fall flat. We forget about how we felt in the moments after defeat. We cannot recall the true depths of our pain.

If you’ve ever spent an evening binging on fast food and sweets, you probably know the feeling that came afterwards. You feel like you’re going to throw up, your mouth is raw from all the sugar and salt, and you feel like you just gained 20 pounds in 2 hours. As you go to sleep that night, you vow to never do that again.

Then 1 month later, you find yourself going out for a late-night fast food run and buying 6 burgers with a side of apple pie and strawberry sundae.

30 minutes later, regret sinks in once again.

Our brains simply aren’t wired to remember everything about an experience. Very often the moment that sticks with us is the peak moment. The highest point of enjoyment. Your brain hardly remembers the sugar crash, it only remembers those initial bites full of bliss. And the further you get away from that experience, the less likely it is for you to be able to recall the pain you experienced.

Whether it’s a sugar crash or a painful loss, we are very quick to forget the painful lessons we experienced. We let them slip past us and in the end, we are doomed to repeat our past mistakes.

The 3 Versions Of You

There are always three versions of ourselves:

• The Past Self
• The Present Self
• The Future Self

These versions of ourselves can sometimes seem like different people. We often feel like the decisions made by the past version of ourselves were immature and naïve. And we choose to let the future versions of ourselves deal with the problems when we choose to procrastinate. However, since neither the past nor future versions of ourselves ever actually “exist” in real time, the only person that suffers is the present version.

Still with me?

What I am trying to say is simple.

We lack empathy for ourselves.

Forgetting what it feels like to be in the shoes of our past self. Failing to remember how painful it was to lose that big match or miss the game winning shot – and in the end, we don’t learn the lesson.

How Can We Combat This?

First off, It’s difficult to relive an emotion, especially if we never take the time to live with it in the first place.

But with one simple practice, it’s possible to properly address this issue.

The next time you experience a painful moment, record how you were feeling afterwards. The regrets you had, the wishes you were making and the promises you made to yourself.

Ask yourself the following questions:

• What are you feeling right now?

• Why are you disturbed by this feeling?

• How could you have handled the situation better?

• What will you do to never let this happen again?

Once you’ve done that, pull out your phone and poliltely telling Siri or Google to set a reminder one month from now.

A month later when that reminder chimes in, go back and review on what you wrote down. Reflect and figure out if you are still on track. If you aren’t, refer to the answer you gave to question 4 (What will you do to never let this happen again?).

Final Thoughts

In a world with so many varying opinions, values, beliefs, and lifestyles, many of us are quick to judge the actions of others.

But before we can do that, we need to be able to properly judge ourselves. We have to take the time to listen to our inner dialogue and understand where it’s coming from. Our brains are wired to avoid things that cause us pain. We instinctively want to protect ourselves. We should do a better job of helping this voice be heard on a regular basis.

By implementing a practice like the one mentioned above, we give ourselves a fighting chance and we allow that inner voice to be heard more clearly. In this present moment, listen to the Past Version of yourself so that the Future Version of yourself can live the life you really want to live. Without no regret.

In conclusion, I will leave you with a quote from The Untethered Soul.

“The only permanent solution to your problems is to go inside and let go of the part of you that seems to have so many problems with reality. Once you do that, you’ll be clear enough to deal with what’s left.” ― Michael Singer

 

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