Confidence is key in any area of your life, without confidence, you can’t close deals. Without confidence in yourself, you will stay at the job you hate forever. Without confidence, you’ll be pushed around by the world.
There’s a myth out there that confidence is something you’re born with. Either you have it or you don’t.
That’s 100% false.
Confidence isn’t something you are born with, it’s something you can acquire.
If you think powerful CEOs, Olympic athletes, and world-class performers are born confident…you’re wrong.
Confidence is just a habit that is developed over time. As Robert Kiyosaki said, “Confidence comes from strict discipline and training.”
Here are seven ways you can train your mind and body to think, feel, and act confidently in any situation in life.
5 Ways to Regain Your Confidence
1. Use Positive Self Talk
What are you saying to yourself on a regular basis? Is your self-talk empowering and positive or negative and pessimistic?
As brain expert, Jim Kwik said, “Studies show that negative self-talk is associated with higher levels of stress and depression.”
A lot of people say things to themselves they would never say to other people. Why is that?
Here’s the thing, your brain is always listening to what you’re saying. Not only what you say to others but the interval talk about your own life.
While I’m not recommending that you lie to yourself because some self-talk is constructive and can actually make you better. But some of it is so negative, it hurts the ability to make progress.
For example, let’s say you’re overweight right now and know that you need to lose weight. First off, congratulate yourself for having the awareness that you need to lose weight to live a better life. Now, the self-talk comes in.
Negative self-talk would be statements like:
- “I’m so fat”
- “I’ve always been this way, I can’t ever lose weight.”
- “I’m always letting myself down and can’t ever achieve my goals.”
On the other hand, positive self-talk would sound like:
- “I’m excited to get in the gym and start releasing this weight for good.”
- “I’m proud of myself for having the discipline to wake up early and go on a run.”
You have to make a choice to be optimistic and engage in positive self-talk. Don’t beat yourself up for whatever you’re going through.
Become your own best friend and use self-talk to fuel massive changes in your life. A good rule of thumb, if you wouldn’t’ say something to someone else, don’t say it to yourself!
2. Get It Done
Confidence is built on accomplishment. If you achieve small and big goals, you’re going to feel much better about yourself.
It all begins with your activity on a daily basis. One of my coaches, Jim Fortin, talks about the importance of having self-integrity. If you say you’re going to do something, you do it. Whether you feel like it or not.
By doing the things you need to do, regardless of how you’re feeling, you will develop self-integrity with yourself. By keeping the promises you make to yourself will make that part of your identity.
This will program your mind to make completing tasks part of who you are.
Think about it, you will respect yourself if you say you’re going to do something and you do it. Not to mention, belief in yourself will come easier, because you know you are not afraid of the work.
This type of daily accomplishment will give you tons of confidence to help you reach your short-term and long-term goals effortlessly.
3. Visualize Yourself Being Confident
Creative visualization is one of the best ways to help you achieve any goal in life, including the goal to have more confidence within yourself. Olympic athletes, CEOs and high performers understand the power of visualization. Because as Napoleon Hill said, “What the mind can conceive and believe it can achieve.”
Visualization works because your brain doesn’t understand the difference between imagination and reality. If you visualize yourself being confident and showing up in the world how you want to on a regular basis, your brain will start to believe.
The trick is to get into a very relaxed state (usually after meditation), close your eyes and imagine being a confident version of yourself. Whether it’s at work, in social settings or speaking with strangers. Imagine yourself carrying conversations, being smooth and people liking you.
Do this over and over again. The brain learns through repetition.
The more you can ingrain this feeling in your nervous system, the faster it will happen in the external world.
4. Help Others
Let’s say you’re great at sales or a sport but you’ve lost confidence for some reason. It’s at these moments where it’s vital to monitor self-talk and remember how good you are. One way to show yourself that is to help others.
Find someone who is trying to do what you’re doing and help them. Instead of focusing on your own temporary confidence issues, volunteer, mentor, or teach someone else. Not only will you see them grow, you will help them move forward.
5. Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway
Think back to the last time you had fear in life and faced it head-on. Maybe it was public speaking or skydiving. If you think about it, I’m sure you scared of it because you weren’t very confident. When you feel in control, you’re not afraid. When you have a level of comfort with something, it’s not scary.
Every single wildly successful person has been afraid, and they’ve kept working and taking risks anyway. Everyone who has achieved anything significant fought past the fear and focused on the task at hand.
The next time you feel the fear, think about how much you want to achieve your goal, then put your fear to the side, and keep going. The trick is to go one day at a time.
Final Thoughts on Confidence
If you’re struggling in your own confidence battle, keep going. Use these tips to help push you forward.
Remember, if you keep doing what you’ve always done, you will get what you’ve always gotten. Mix it up and find the confidence within yourself to achieve your biggest goals and dreams.